I have noticed, from friends and family, that many people are suffering through relationship breakups. Many are getting through their pain with hate while others allow insecurities and low self-esteem to take over their emotions. What we are not seeing is the true problem. The problem is not that it's his fault or her fault, not to say that either in the relationship is at fault, because "fault" is not the problem. The true problem is knowledge. Situations like these will always teach you what to look for in future relationships and what "red flags" not to ignore.
Everyone in this life wants happiness, love, to laugh, feel proud about themselves, and enjoy this life. However most people believe these things can only be achieved by partnering with a lover and that is not the case. These things are achieved when we know what we want and set a goal to acquire them. A lover is only one of the things on our list. If your list begins with "someone to make me happy" you've already gone down the wrong path. You can only find someone to make you happy if you're already happy. "If I'm already happy then I don't need someone" EXACTLY! You see, when you're happy, you attract people who are also happy. When you are miserable happy people don't feel comfortable around you. That includes potential lovers. That leave only miserable people to pick from. How can someone miserable make you happy? On the other hand, if you're happy miserable people don't feel comfortable around you. If you don't like happy people, that should tell you something.
This is my suggestion and believe me I hate to do this kind of things myself however, it actually works. Sit down and write everything you want out of life. The kind of work you want to do, the kind of place you want to live in, the kind of car you would like to drive, the kind of home you would like to live in, the TV, sofas, bed, curtains, etc... and yes the man/woman, but lets get to that one later. Right now you can begin acquiring the small things like curtains, TV, and possibly even what kind of car you want. Maybe not all at once but, little by little. Start with the curtains and every time you look at them say to yourself, "If I got these, I can get a TV." With a little more work and saving in time you'll acquire that TV you've always wanted and, when you watch it say to yourself, "If I was able to get this, then I can get that car I want." As you continue acquire each desire feel good about your accomplishments and happy about your life.
Ignore and stay away from people who tell you, you can't. Keep positive. After all it's just a curtain. After that think, "It's just a TV, it's just a car, etc..." Because in reality these things are truly small when you look at them one at a time. It's when you try to look at everything all at once that you become overwhelmed by it all and it seems too much to handle by yourself.
Oh yeah, that special person you have in mind? You will find by the time you've acquire all the small things you want that he/she has entered you life without you even noticing. Just keep in mind that anyone who is not helping you acquire what you desire will be the reason it's lost, stolen, or broken. No one truly knows the value of something unless they paid for it. Usually while you're looking for the things you desire, you'll find someone else looking for them too. Friends are those people who you have something enjoyable to talk about with.
If you have someone in your life that has nothing in common with you, that friendship is not by choice but rather by obligation. There is nothing wrong with having friends with whom you have nothing in common with but, they are usually not close friends. They are usually acquaintances and you can never have too many of those but, they don't influence your life. An individual's personality can be completely different from yours while their likes and dislikes are the same and vice versa. More important than personality is commonality because you have a ground to stand on. While having the same personality will be detrimental to your relationship. If you have two people with strong attitudes they will always fight and two people with submissive attitudes will be miserable because they can 't express their feelings so they will eventually run away. Always reach for what you want, and...
Always stay in your write mind...